Acid Scouting

I’m so tired right now that I feel like I just gave blood. I’m seeing spots in the periphery, and certain things appear larger than normal, specifically people’s faces when they are talking up in my personal space. I have been in this state before, and it’s a mixture of extreme sleep deprivation and a sonic dosage of caffeine, mixed with a couple paper tabs of acid that I took in high school, which still occasionally affect me to this day. My first really bad acid trip, occurred a week before my Eagle Scout Review Board Defense, which made that experience a little more peculiar than normal. I was extremely paranoid and nervous that I would not pass the review for some reason, as ultimately you get grilled by 5 guys in their 60s regarding your devotion to Scouting and the important lessons that you’ve learning along the way.

In the middle of the interview, I got the saucer eyes going, and one committee members’ (who was asking me a direct question about my experience as a Patrol Leader at the National Jamboree) head swelled up to about twice the size that it should normally be, and it was sweaty, distorted, and bulbous. I had to ask him to repeat the question like 3 times to wrap my brain around what was being requested, and miraculously I pulled through. General warping and melting was going on around, weird smells and vibes were in the air, and that sense of total panic, where you feel as if your mental control has evaporated entirely into the void, had permeated my system. Just when I had internally given up all hope, and had generally accepted that I had to ditch the interview immediately, and roam the streets for eternity in a psychedelic/schizophrenic dimension, it came to an abrupt halt, and everything was as velvety smooth as upscale cool ranch dressing. Although I don’t remember what I muttered during my flashback portion of the interview, I do remember getting some very uncanny looks from these old geezers for the remaining few minutes of the defense.

Regardless, they passed my hippie-ass, ultimately promoting me to the upper ranks of the underground adolescent loser society.
Tommy James - Meet The Comer
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